Dearest Friends,
On behalf of the execs (Roel, Marleina, and I), I would just like to send out a message to you all regarding the prevalent issue around FAMILIES. It has come to our attention that this has become an important matter that is waiting to be resolved, seeing as a few general body members came to our most recent board meeting to express their feelings about the “family” issue. After listening to a few individuals’ perspectives with such heartfelt emotions, we have concluded that we will address our community in hopes of acknowledging the issue and gaining more understanding and awareness of what some general body members are concerned about.
First and foremost, I would like to express my gratitude for those of you that were able to show up to the KP STAR retreat. The KP STAR retreat was extended out to all of the general body members and community members and not limited to just KP STAR participants. For those that do not know, KP STAR is a program that aims to strengthen the inner workings amongst its members; underscore its values of communication, support, and retention; and ultimately hopes to foster an inclusive and unified community within KP. Within the KP STAR program, we have three components: Peer Counseling, Tutoring, and Kuya/Ate/Ading. Regarding the latter, because KP is a new and unfamiliar place to some students, the Kuya/Ate/Ading component exists to facilitate our efforts in ensuring that this space is not intimidating and uncomfortable. This component provides upper-class mentors to the freshpeople of KP in an effort to break down the barriers between all members of KP so that everyone is able to feel at ease in this organization and is willing to get involved. As a Kuya or an Ate, you are encouraged to build a close relationship with your Ading and to help her or him feel comfortable in participating in KP activities and events. As an Ading, we hope that you will be willing to open yourself up to new things and to put yourself out there in all that KP can offer you. However, during this year’s fall KP STAR retreat, we were unable to foresee what consequences would play out during the Kuya/Ate/Ading revealing portion of the retreat.
A few of the individuals that were at the board meeting voiced their concerns that “families” are being exclusive, the way Adings are revealed is unequal, and, more importantly, that “families” obscure the main purpose of the Kuya/Ate/Ading component. Moreover, the concern is that “families” are undermining what the program primarily intends to do. Seeing as the visibility of the revealing was obvious with the large “families” all together and the smaller “families” distanced, the fear was that the Kuyas and Ates that do not have that extension would be overlooked or seen as inadequate. With these concerns, we have seen the issue mainly as “family visibility” during the Kuya/Ate/Ading revealing, as well as outside of the KP space.
To reiterate what the purpose of the Kuya/Ate/Ading program is, the component exists to facilitate our efforts in ensuring that this space is not intimidating and uncomfortable. It mainly focuses on the one-on-one interaction one may have with his or her respective pair(s) and understands that the forming of “families” completely exists outside of the program. We just ask everyone to please keep in mind the goal of the program and to be more aware of how individuals may perceive the idea of “families.” That new adings are “welcomed to families” instead of individual relationships might seem to slight the focus at hand. Hype around families not only misses the original intent of the program, but it also possibly generates more divisions than unity in KP. Expensive gifts, uniform signs, and family competitions (notions of “better families,” if you will) might detract from community spirit from those outsiders looking in. Thus, as execs who come from different “family backgrounds,” we feel it might be best to make “family dinners/hangouts/time” less public, to understand the implications of what the word “family” brings for various individuals, and to be more cognizant of the privileges you and others may have for just being matched the way you were matched.
Overall, as a community member, general body member, board member, or exec, I hope to carry Kaibigang Pilipino to its fullest potential and to continue welcoming new members as well as retaining its members through what the organization stands for. We are a community, and a community is nothing without its people. Together, we can make change and foster a better community for all of us. On behalf of the execs, I would just like to thank you for all the support and concerns you may have for this space.
Isang Mahal,
Christene Manglal-lan
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